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OnyxI remember the walks we never had under the stars we never saw and the chances to make memories that I missed. I curse myself more and more each day that you're gone. I think of all the times we talked and all that's left for me to say is that I care about you more than anyone else.
I need you more and more each day, I need you here with me. I swear that one day I will see you, and I'll never leave your side.
I can't help keep thinking of the last time that I saw you, of all the things I left unsaid, of all the late night conversations when I should've been begging you to stay instead of flying away in the morning. Spread your wings and come flying back to me.
Maybe Fate has a different plan for us, a future where we can always be together. Until that day I swear you're in my thoughts and prayers…but still…
Saying GoodnightSo here I am. 2am listening to the saddest songs I can find.
All I can think of is you. Nothing else compares to you.
I have realised you are the one I cannot do without.
So I just sit here, pouring out tears of ink,
trying to find the perfect hook, a catchy line to describe the indescribable.
But nothing is that simple.
How can it be when our instruments are hopes and dreams?
I guess that I can never come close to him
I say love is foolish.
I know you love him
But somehow still think you may care for me again one day
Oh well, time for me to sign off now
I say goodnight to your pictures
and hope beyond hope that one day I'll kiss you goodnight.
I should never have let you go.
As Dreams Turn To DustAnd here am I, as emotions fade to grey
Caught in an unwanted spectrum
Feelings crashing down in flames
The small fires sparking and flaring
Singeing the red of my heart
Is this all I am?
A blister on the heart of love
Unloved and uncared for?
Where are you as my dreams turn to dust
As my hope fades and dies in your fire
Your hair sweeping a burning passage
Across the fields of my blackened soul
Turning it to ashes to float on the wind
How can this be?
This pain between us
From something so pure.
In TimeI wait:
underneath my thoughts,
through its riverbeds.
tears fall into dry banks
memories fill them.
...Tension, is building between
our bones; cracking
these boundaries that bind
[lets not get lost in the moment
Our Wayward Starsguide the specimen
through the maze
and through the rain
rinsing our clothes
like they're still on fire
and somewhere, well
they probably are
and you pray
like tomorrow itself
is the fuel
that empties our dark places
like what lives there
goes away at dawn
but it doesn't
and i pray
like tonight itself
is the dark
that fuels our light
like what lives in each
feeds the ugly other
and it might
but, we're all prey
and the dream itself
is the place where
our chemical flames
hit the surface
flailing as we sink
in panicked clothes
from a distance
we must look like
lost, accepting the
drowning slow burn
of our descent
we look like what we are
MoreWith a broken heart- you’ll starve
All the love you’ll receive will drip out
And constantly you’ll be ‘needing’ more.
melting i've kept a philanthropist
chained to a metal desk
he's starved to the ribs, smeared
in hate and loathing,
starving and sensitive.
i watch his eyes,
melted silver pills
stretched between two little pits.
today, i'll unlock him.
give him a blanket
offer him coffee,
and a fresh heart
(i can spare a pulse)
love is a medicine
that will never cost a thing
Love's FearHe holds her,
maybe he is ready
to talk about love.
He takes a breath.
She takes a breath.
She is not ready for love,
her heart is cold;
left from a frozen wasteland of a childhood,
she can not receive his love.
He takes another breath,
maybe its not the right time,
He noticed she was upset,
the scars on her arms left a trail
to her heart.
He is unsure.
She is unsure.
Maybe love is possible,
a hug can go a long way in life
thawing ones insides.
Chewing the half moons of his fingers.
Chewing the half ways of her fingers.
He sighs, ready to take the big step,
lightly taps her on the shoulder;
he is now ready he thinks.
He opens his mouth to speak.
She opens her mouth to speak.
AndieAndie, I know how it feels to cry,
To feel the pain well up inside.
Andie, I know what it's like to feel
as though the world has turned against you
Even though you're half the world away,
I promise that I'll see you someday
And even though you're half the world away
I promise that I'm always here for you.
Andie, I know what it's like
to struggle on against the odds,
even though it seems best to give up:
Andie, I pray you just keep trying
All Here For A ReasonI turned onto a shady, well-manicured driveway that, for all intents and purposes, looked harmless enough. Maple trees lined both sides of the street, and a parade of Canadian geese marched across the road to a wide duck pond with a flamboyant fountain. There were blooming crepe myrtles and rose-of-sharons, and as I grew closer to my destination, neatly trimmed gardens with neatly trimmed bushes.
I stopped to let the geese pass. They looked at me; one hissed. I honked my horn and moved around them.
At the end of the road sat a collection of grayish buildings and a number of signs directing me to the appropriate parking lot. "Welcome to Ten Creeks Hospital," said one of them. "Please enjoy your stay." I parked in the visitor's lot. Surely I wouldn't be staying.
I was shaking when I got out of my car. I had spent the morning getting high. One foot in front of the other, flip-flop noises, hot sidewalk. Mulberry and magnolia trees, freshly shaved grass. A bench and pan for smokers. A set o
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